Saturday my little man requested a "Fun Family Day". So of course we had to oblige. Since my little guy likes planes, we took him to the airport where there's a cafe, and had a delicious lunch looking out on the airport as the planes came and went. Afterwards we took the kids out to the picnic area so they could see the planes from there. It was so fun seeing my little guys face light up whenever the planes came in and took off. Of course now he went from wanting to be a fireman to a pilot. I told him he could totally do both!
And then, while the boys went shoe browsing... The girls were stylin in some hats ;-)
Sooo Coool ;-)
Why who could it be?.......
So after plane watching, some fun at the park, getting some fake tattoos, frozen yogurt, and playing around at the store. We ended "Family Fun Day" with a great family movie and popcorn. I highly recommend "Family Fun Days"! :-) So glad my little man is a genius! ;-)
Ok,since school started I have walked my 6 yr old son to class every morning. I mean, I know he's growing up and I did the whole "letting go" business by showing up the first day of kindergarten, so he can at least give me that much right???
.......WRONG!
See, last Friday his daddy took him to school, and my son asks his dad if he can please walk to class by himself. Of course his dad said yes and so come Monday he tells me this on our way to school and says he wants to continue to walk to class by himself! After a little hyperventilating and what I think may have been an anxiety attack I asked
"Are you sure??" hoping he would see my heart breaking and feel sorry for his momma and say "Of course you can walk me mommy" ....Nope, not a chance! "I'm REALLY sure I want to walk myself to class" were the words that he said that pierced this mommas heart.
So of course like a good mommy I drove through the circle drive instead of parking. Watched as the teacher opened the car door and greeted my little man with a "Good Morning" and watched as he carried his oversized Iron Man backpack and Cars lunch kit with him through the front doors. Of course me being the crazy mommy that I am. I drove around front and parked my truck and watched as my son came out the side doors and crossed the little outside walk and into the hall where his class is. And I have been doing that for the last week! Now don't you judge me!
Today, however, I couldn't park in front cause some other 10 cars decided to block me!
So, after another anxiety attack and a frantic phone call to my hubby who was in the middle a meeting but calmly talked me down, I was ok.
Yea I know, crazy mom. You know, I don't like the way that sounds so much, so how about in spanish La Mami Loca? Yea I like that better.It sounds like it could be a gangster name. ;-)
So there it is. Another morning in the life of La Mami Loca!
I got to sleep in a little later than I normally do, because my oh so amazing husband took half a day, got up with the kids, got them dressed, fed and off to school. *deep breath* that's why I am in love with this man. Did I mention he's amazing...;-) Had an appt. for a medical test I had to have done, and as fun as it was NOT, I passed with a good report, thank you Jesus! So I know now I'm not dying and I can stop going through the cemetery headstone catalogue. Yes, there are catalogues. ;-) And to make it even better, after dropping my sugar daddy off at work my 15 yr old took ME to a nice relaxing lunch at the airport cafe. We sat, ate, talked girl talk, laughed and then walked around outside. The weather was PERFECT, the company was PERFECT, & yes my Patty Melt was PERFECT! lol And so, of course, here are a few pictures of me and Big girl. I still can't believe she's old enough to buy her momma a meal. Oh boy!
"In every life a little rain must fall"
Pshhh! Yea right, try a Tsunami or a hurricane!
Thats what this last week has felt like.
It's been filled with family drama, personal drama, Church drama, Yo mama drama. You name it, there was drama!
I felt like every time I turned around someone was miserable and was determined to cause misery or was trying to bring me down with their negativity & discouragement.
And I don't know about you, but I can only smile & remind myself of the love Jesus only so long when I begin to wonder if WWJD-(what would Jesus do) is really slap some people down & tell them to stop all that drama long enough to let Him speak into their lives!
By about yesterday I sware I felt like I was in a scene from one of those freaky movies where I was standing in the center of a tornado and everything(& everyone) was swirling all around me at once and all I wanted to do was disappear! (or make certain people disappear!)
I know The Shirelles said, "mama said there'd be days like this" but I thought they meant those days would be a little more sporadic!
I think, right now, I like LL Cool J's sentiments better- "Mama said Knock You Out!" ......
I sware I'm not losing it. (cause you can't lose something that's already gone! lol J/K!)
Just been "one of those" weeks.
I KNOW I'm not the only one, so here it is-
As long as we keep trusting in the Lord and not in ourselves -We can do all things (& make it through all things) through Christ who strengthens us.
Even in those moments when it's "just to much" we can hide in the shadow of his wings and rest until we find the strength to keep going.
& When all is said and done I'll be a stronger woman, mother, friend, daughter, & leader for not letting go or giving up and for clinging to, listening to & being obedient to Him.
And remember, when life brings the rain, just dance.
Let me catch you up a little bit on what I’ve been doing this whole time.
Let’s see, I can even describe it in one brief sentence……
Being a mom, wife, woman, daughter, sister, friend, worship leader, babysitter, among many other things.
I’ve been keeping busy, which is good, cause I don’t do bored very well.
For the past, uhm not quite sure how long I’ve had this blog, but for as long as I’ve had it and have tried to be consistent in writing in it (which has been a super fail), I’ve tried to figure out exactly what type of blog I wanted to keep.
I’ve read other blogs, and have sorda just been “trying this out” without really knowing what, I guess, my “theme” would be.
So here’s what I’ve come up with…..
I’m just going to stop trying so hard! I’m not going to THINK about it anymore. I’m just going to write.
I’m going to write about what I know and do best.
And that, friends, would be about all the sweet, crazy, and sometimes sarcastic goodness that is me. And all the sweet, crazy, ups & downs that is my life.
I did decide that, in my case, this blog should come with a warning.
So here you go......
"WARNING!:
Read at your own risk! This blog may, at times, contain severe doses of sarcasm and ranting and raving.
At other times it may contain some really deep, mushy, gushy type stuff. And on some occasions comedy, drama, and action, if not all three!
This blog at any given moment can go from rated G to rated R!…OK OK, maybe not rated R… maybe rated PG-13.
The topics on this blog are not limited to any one theme and may go from raging hormones and irrational ranting about family and children to church life, God encounters and Brad Pitt.
Side affects may include, and are not limited to, whip lash; dizziness; sudden outbursts of laughter, tears and possibly other bodily fluids, loss of breath from astonishment; and in some very rare cases chronic yawning from boredom which only occurs in those who have Lackohumor Disorder."
So there it is and there you have it. I promise to write at least once a week or more.
I'm still working on my "Firsts" list, which is turning into an epic fail, but I'm trying!
Now I must leave you, because if I'm not mistaken, that was a shatter I just heard in the distance and the gasp and "Oooooo I'm telling!" from a 6 and 9 yr old. That's my cue! ;-)
Any other school year this would have been a normal thing for me (and no not my first, just wait for it)........
Summer vacation & then back to school.
But this year was different. At the start of this school year, my 15 yr old daughter wasn’t just beginning her 1st yr of High school,
and my 9 yr old her first day of 4th grade,
but this school year marked a BIG first for me.
My 6 yr old son, my baby, my last child, was starting his very first day of school EVER!
See with my girls it was different. It IS different. When they started school, yes it was bitter sweet and yes I got emotional, but not like this. I'm not sure why or what it is. I'm still learning. But there is a huge difference between daughters and sons. And to top it off he's the last one...he's my baby.
So this was extremely devastating for me for several reasons.
1)Hello this is my BABY!
2)Was he ready?!
3)Was I ready?!
4)This meant everything was changing!
5)Hello this is my BABY!! (ok I know I said that already)
My son, my tiny baby boy who has been at home with his mommy since birth was now ready to leave and become a tiny man.
All summer I had to mentally and emotionally prepare for it.
And the whole week before that dreaded first day of school my stomach was in knots.
Questions swarming my mind like….”What if he gets some meany of a teacher?”, “What if he doesn’t like it?”, “What if he gets scared?”,
OR OMG “What if he DOES like it and grows up and realizes he doesn’t need me anymore?!?!?!” GASP!!
For all the moms out there I know you are nodding your heads in agreement.
This was a HUGE first for me! It was a bitter-sweet moment and a huge step in both mine and my little mans life.
I knew there was no way around it. My husband forbid me to even think of homeschooling him. Something about him being a boy and this would be good for him…blah blah blah … I tuned out after that.
I knew in my heart that no matter how badly I just wanted to keep him at home with me, only like FOREVER, that wasn’t an option.
He, like his older siblings, was growing up, and there’s nothing I could do to stop it!
So, like a good mommy, I put on my brave face and let my son know that everything was going to be great.
And that first day came quickly.
(My Little Man. I'm so proud of him!)
Yesterday me and his daddy walked our little man to class.
Where, of course, he has one of the best teachers ever.
He was just a little nervous, but excited at the same time. He smiled when we got to his class. We hugged him and told him we’d be back real soon and he was OK. … He was actually more than just OK. He did GREAT.
My little man.
Of course, mommy….well she was a different story.
As soon as we got in the truck, mommy lost her brave face and lost it.
I cried. I cried and wailed about how my little baby was gone….
How everything from that moment would be different, because he wouldn’t need me anymore, and that I didn’t care how big any of my kids got they would always be my babies…. Oh it was a terribly sight!! I was a blubbering fool.
And my husband, like the good hubby he is… he just listened. He listened to my cry baby, snotty, wailing and held my hand. And when I was finally done, he wiped my tears and tried to find something good to say, but it went something like this "You know they have to grow up & now its kindergarten, one day it'll be high school and then they'll be gone" When he saw the tears and snot again he stopped...QUICKLY and instead offered we go for a walk to clear our heads. ... I love him, he tries :-) Hey! He took the whole week off, just cause he knew I would be a hot mess if I had to do this alone! That's love baby! ... Oh Ok, back to my point ....
All day I looked at the clock. Counting down the hours til 3:00 where I would rush to the school and scoop up my baby and console him if he was scared and apologize for leaving him there and promise to never take him back to that awful place ever again!!
But what really happened was, we did rush to pick him up cause I couldn’t wait to see my little man.
He jumped in the truck with the biggest smile on his face and couldn’t catch his breath long enough between sentences to tell me what an awesome day he had at school! And couldn’t wait to GO BACK!! And what’s worse….. OMG it’s hard to even think about this!.... What’s worse…. He said… My baby boy….. “ You know what mommy, I had such a good day, I didn’t even think about you once” !!!! .... *Sigh*
I know, I know... I need to look at that as a good thing... Ugh!
So there you have it. I'm learning to let go and let my babies begin their different seasons on this journey called LIFE.
My 15 yr old daughter who has already begun.....
My 9 yr old (who I sometimes think is secretly 30!) who is beginning...
And then my 6 yr old little man who has only just begun.....
Well hello again!.....
I have finally returned with a couple of "Firsts" for you!
Bout time! I know!
I will be brief, because I am typing this post from my iPhone!
Yup! That's a first for me! Lol
If you know me, you know I'm not the most well organized person.
Okay, I fail miserably in the organization department.
But, for those that know me, also know that when I do take on a task
I take that baby on and do my best to get it done and done right!
Which brings to my first "First"
I organized and saw through to the grueling end, my first big concert!
A big spanish christian band came to our church last Wednesday.
I didn't realize how popular they actually were. But the almost 800 people
who attended that night proved otherwise!
The is the first event like this I have ever taken on to plan and coordinate.
It was tiring, frustrating, & involved ALOT of details!
And did I mention I did it in LESS than 4 weeks!
Although it turned out to be quite a task, from contracts,to making hotel reservations to
Posters & advertising to organizing lists and lists of technical & production issues, to organizing teams of security and parking and sales tables and ushers to transportation and....
Oh my! Sorry I said I'd keep this brief!!
Well I have to say that the night of the concert went amazingly well!!
Everyone working together and everything running like clockwork!
And to see almost 800 people having a great time and being blessed by,what turned out to be not only a talented band but a great group of people who allow themselves to be used by the Lord in a great way! Well it made every bit of the hard work more than worth it!!
I have to admit that I enjoyed the challenge. I may have grunted and pounded my fist a few times, but I enjoyed it ;-) & I think, secretly, look forward to doing it again! :-O
And P.S. There is no way that any of it would have worked or come together without the greatest people who stepped to VOLUNTEER! Thats the people from Primera Asamblea De Dios Lufkin Texas!! God Bless them richly!!
So it's Wednesday already!
This week has gone by so incredibly fast for me!
I know I was going to start my "New Things" post, but I haven't slowed down enough to even try old things.
After this week things should, I hope and cross my fingers, slow down a bit more so that I can actually begin to not only begin to try my "New Things" but actually enjoy doing it!!
Soooo with that said, I'm open to any suggestions or ideas on what new, incredible, & perhaps tasty, new things I could try! :)
So I last left off with my ranting about feeling "lost". Well what's worse, you ask, then already feeling like a crazy women who is getting old and losing herself??? Sitting in a doctors office with about 20something 80 year olds! And NO I'm not exaggerating! (This time)
I had to take my mother, oh my sweet dear mother, to an eye doctor appointment. Accompanying us were my 15, 8, & 5 yr old children.
So let's recap so far... An overcrowded Doctors office full of at LEAST 25 80 something yr old people, Me, and my 3 kids. This made for an interesting 4 hours. Yes, FOUR HOURS! At one point my 5 yr old son and one of these 80something yr old ladies, who was obviously perturbed that I would even think of bringing my kids, were caught in a stare down.
So between telling my 8 yr old daughter to stop staring at the older ladies wig, that was very obviously on backwards or maybe sideways and that no she couldn't tell the lady or fix it for her, and Yes I promise I will never wear pantyhose with sandals. And repetitively asking my son to quit making farting noises behind the older man we were sitting behind because I really think the poor man thought it was himself and was getting upset and wondering why my son would hold his nose and giggle at him. And let's not forget my 15 yr old daughter who's loud sighing and the need to constantly remind me of all the old, grumpy, and sometimes not so pleasantly smelling people we were surrounded by were sorda creepin her out. We managed to survive!
What did I learn from this experience..... 1.) It definitely confirmed my fears of getting old!!
2.) If I'm ever wearing a crooked wig, smell funny, or am making funny noises, I can always count on my kids to point it out........In Public! :)
Have you ever felt just not "yourself"? Like somewhere waaay back on life's busy road you forgot about yourself and left "You" somewhere and can't remember exactly where or when that was? I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that this is pretty common for busy women (and I'm sure men as well) But I don't like it :( I don't like this feeling of being "Lost".
I have racked my brain over and over trying so hard to figure out when it was and where exactly I stepped off the train and left myself! If I could just get past all the clutter that has accumulated in my brain and try not to get crushed by the traffic jam of thoughts buzzing in my head 24/7, then maybe I could figure it out, but just thinking of doing that is taking so much energy out of me! And trust me, right now I'm doing everything I can to conserve what little energy(and patience) I have left!
Did I mention how much I hate this feeling?? I hate not being sure of who I am. That's just not me! I mean, I'm a mom, I'm a wife, I'm a caretaker, I work, I take care of our home...I'm definitely lots of things. Important things. But it dawned on me the last couple of days "where am I"??? Not mom, wife, caretaker, worker, home manager, but ME?
And don't get me wrong. I wouldn't trade being a mom, or wife, or any of those jobs for anything in the world!...... But I also don't want to lose "Me". The fun me, the girl that laughs at the silliest things, the sensitive me who loves even the cheesiest, soppiest, romantic movies and will cry buckets. The carefree me who will dance a silly dance and sing at the top of her lungs no matter who's listening or looking, or take a crazy dare and do something she's never done, and try something new everyday.................
* Sigh * Maybe I'm being silly. Maybe I'm getting old and this is just what happens when you get old. You go through youth withdrawals or something. I have no idea. I just know that I need to find "Me" again, cause I really miss "Me" and I'm sure wherever "Me" is she is really missing me too. That or my "Me" is just being silly and got bored and decided she needed to be "Me" somewhere else and have fun without me! And if that's the case when I do find my "Me" she's in big trouble! ;)
Sooo these are the rants of an aging crazy lady who is in desperate need to find herself and have a little fun and maybe get into a little something! ;)
I like the idea of trying something new everyday. And I think I just may do that. I think that will be the beginning of my journey on finding "Me" :) There you go! That's exactly what I'll do then :)
I just love summer time! I'm not really quite sure what it is.Maybe it's the sunshine. Or the fact that I have a reason to shave my legs and wear shorts, tank tops and flip flops. Maybe it's that I can float around in the pool and see how tan I can get by the end of summer ;) Ok so I know it's been about 120 degrees lately, but it just doesn't bother me. I love summer and everything about it. So anyway, here are some things I have gotten to do so far already this summer.
I golfed for the first time!
And, let's see, how can I put this..... Girls with big, uhm, large, ... uhhh, ...Girls who are blessed up top! Shouldn't take up golfing! But despite the fact that I had to work around the "twin towers" to hit the ball, it was fun!
Went To Galveston Beach For FIRST TIME!
Yes, Yes it's sad, but true! I have never been to the beach. This was my first trip to the beach with some girlfriends. And I must admit, it was everything I expected and more. I could live on the beach!
This is me, on the beach. You can't see my face, but trust me, there's a look of pure excitement on it. And yes, that is my friends behind on the left and her two little feet. I almost cropped it, but then thought...NAH. I was like a little kid ;)
And over to the left of your screen is what we liked to call our sand turd. Yes, I know, what a gross name. I tried to think of a better name but turd just kept coming back up again and again.
I'm not sure who that lady is waving at us. Maybe she thought I was taking her pic? Dunno. But here you have my FIRST trip to the beach!
Took this pic on Fathers Day. I know this really doesn't count as something I actually did, but it was a first, and I was a part of it, and it's my blog so I can put it just cause! ;) This is my handsome hubby and beautiful daughters first Father/Daughter Fathers Day outting.
Here's another first. I've been a bride, but never a bridesmaid! This is me getting dolled up for my best friends wedding! I was the Matron of Honor, thank you very much ;)
I can't believe that I did this hairdo on my own. And it stayed the WHOLE day! Thanks to an excellent lesson in curls 101 by my girl Kelly and an entire can of Pantene Extra Hold Humidity Control Hair Spray!!
And to the right, my gown :)
Me being me :-p
And Us Being US!
So there you have it. This summer has been great so far. I wish it were summer all year long :) (I think in about 10 more years it just may!)
Still have about 6 more weeks of summer vacation left. Let's see what we can get into! ;) Happy Summer Ya'll!
About 27 yrs ago... OMG! 27 Yrs! ... whoa! Ok..... I meet this little brown haired girl in kindergarten, then realize she lives right across the street from me! It was history from there..... From playing house, a crazy obsession with New Kids On the Block (what girl didn't and girls my age still do!) Teen magazine (I rocked the Kirk Cameron poster! Whoa baby!) Staying up all night talking about boys, TO boys, crying over boys and planning what different ways we could pay back the jerks that hurt us, Listening to "Please Don't Cry" & "November Rain" & "Sweet Child O Mine" by G N' R (Oh that Axl Rose!) Oh and don't forget the hairspray for the big bangs! I bought Aquanet by bulk!..... Wow okay! She went from being my good friend, to my best friend, to more of a sister. If there was anyone I could trust, it was her. If there were anyone I knew would understand, it was her. I will always cherish the memories we made. From almost having our blood drained by bats (Ok I MIGHT be exaggerating just a little on that) , to our short lived attempt at running away and conquering the world, to our great "Adventures". I won't go into details about those, but boy do we still laugh til our sides hurt about those adventures!! :)
Yesterday my sweet dear friend looked like a princess walking down that aisle as she began the greatest adventure yet. The adventure of a lifetime with her best friend (No not me!) , and after yesterday, her husband :) To see her smiling, laughing, so happy, meant so much to me. Because this girl, this sweet lady, she deserves it and more. So I want to say Congratulations Jason and Veronica on your new journey together. I pray the Lord bless you with lots of love, joy, laughter, hope, peace and blessings! Hold on tight cause the adventure has just begun!
P.S. Oh and Jason, this doesn't mean you get to hog all the adventures Okay??? Save me a few!! ;)
So I know I haven't posted anything on my blog in quite some time! I was about to give up, but I find that there's just something therapeutic about this whole blog stuff, so I'll give another shot.
So what brought me back you ask? ... An accident. This last Sunday my pastor at my church was preaching about Angels. The existence of Angels. What Angels do and how our Heavenly Father surrounds us with Angels every day. Well tonight, I believe that more than I think I ever have. While at a friends house for a birthday party, my 5 yr old son was swimming with his 8 yr old sister and some other kids. My son doesn't know how to swim. But does okay with a floaty. He had a small ring floaty that he was using to swim around the pool in. (Yes I can already hear the groans) I was sitting nearby with some other friends laughing and talking. All of a sudden I hear one of the ladies that was there, yell out my name and then my sons name and the next words that came out of her mouth not only made it feel like the blood had drained from my body, but sent me on a roller coaster of emotions within 30 seconds."You're son was drowning" What had happened was he reached down to try and grab some goggles and he reached down to far and the floaty slipped off over his head and somehow my son let go and pushed it away and he went under. Another child's mom happened to be standing right there next to him and when her child yelled out she was able to act quickly and she pulled him out by his hands where he was flailing around. .... I ran over to my son, who was catching his breath and the look on his face absolutely broke my heart into a million pieces. He was horrified. I, being me, tried to hold it together. But inside, OMG, I was dying. As I held him in my arms and assured him it was all okay, I was doing everything I could not to leap out of my skin. Within those, about 5 mins, I felt absolute horror, terrifying fear, heartbreak like I have never felt, guilt, guilt and more guilt. Why? I was supposed to be watching him. I was right nearby for goodness sakes!! What kind of a mother wouldn't think to make sure her child is safe? And then finally...What if it had been worse?? What if no one had been close by to see him? What if no one had heard the other child yell out? After all I never heard it. It was to loud and I was distracted. What if?? What if?? Tonight I learned MANY lessons. But one them is, God is ALWAYS with me. And YES Melissa, Angels do exist! I found one tonight, she was in the form of a beautiful young lady named Marisol. God put her in just the right place at exactly the right time and she pulled my baby boy out of the pool. The other Angel - my husband. Because although he could have stopped and questioned me, gave me a lecture about pool and water safety, & make me feel even more guilty and horrible then I already did. He didn't. He kept his cool when he saw that all I wanted to do was lose mine. And even after we left and came home and I lost it. I completely lost it and had an emotional meltdown. He held me and told me "It's not your fault" He knew he didn't need to tell me all the things I did wrong, because I already knew. He just held me and prayed over me and held me some more. Tonight before bed, I held my son. I held him tight. And I thanked my Father God for never leaving me. For giving me new insight on life. And for Angels.
